So you’re in a relationship. Its going well and you’re both comfortable. But are you the right kind of comfortable. Sometimes good relationships aren’t really that good. If you’ve been contemplating yours here’s some food for thought.
1. You aren’t going in the same direction
Let’s face it, life is a series of destinations. We are always coming and going with some form of goal attached to each step in the journey. Let’s say you have a goal of marriage and your partner isn’t quite sold on the idea of long-term commitment. You can always hold out and hope that changes. You can even step your game up and hope they switch gears. The harsh reality is that often times you are simply spinning your wheels and quite possibly missing out on someone who shares the same desire. Cut your losses and get your shoes.
2. You don’t share the same feelings
You are madly in love, them not so much or vice versa. It happens there is no perfected recipe for falling in love with someone. But whoever you are, you are totally worth someone who loves you back instead of someone who just really likes you. Not to mention when the feelings aren’t shared neither is the effort. Relationships take work; you don’t want to end up run down and feeling unappreciated.
3. You Don’t share the same foundation
Foundation, morals or your fundamental belief system are important. It affects your day to day decisions, how you interact with one another and others. If you have too wide of a gap in what you both believe it can lead to a plethora of issues. You might find yourselves arguing as a result. Disagreeing on how to raise the kids, abortions, daylight savings, if keeping an extra 5 because the cashier miscounted is stealing. Who knows the possibilities are endless when it comes to this category. Protect your peace sis and move on.
4. You know you’re settling
I know dating can get frustrating and on occasion being single can seem like it sucks. It all boils down to your perspective. I mean honestly do you really want to be in a relationship with someone you aren’t that compatible with and might not even like just to avoid being alone? True society makes it seems as though you have fatal flaws when your single, but just hold out you know your worth it. If you don’t know your worth it you need some personal time to figure out you are and why so just don’t do it.
5. You can’t be yourself
The single greatest thing you bring to a relationship is you. All of you the good, the bad, and the all too ugly. What is the purpose of being in a situation where it is acceptable to be anyone but who you are? Someone who loves or cares about you will do so unconditionally. That doesn’t mean they like everything you do. They do, however, like you and who you are at your core. Everyday of your relationship should not feel like your in a new job on probation. If it does just go ahead dust of your resume and quit boo, your assets will be thoroughly valued elsewhere in a new position.
I know, I know dating can be overwhelming. What can I say other than PERSPECTIVE! Lol, have fun with it, each date is an adventure. If you know it isn’t gonna work early cut your losses politely and move forward to the next candidate. It isn’t as dismal as it seems there are tons of single people out there. If you know what you want though you aren’t going to find it sitting at home or wasting away in an okay relationship that has signs of never changing. If you can, by all means work together to correct the things you need to. If you feel like Keisha D, I’m totally happy and content with this. Do you boo boo by all means be blessed. For the rest of you if can’t fix it, fix you and then get up and get back on out there.